Tags
aging, Beauty, Eyeglasses, friends, glasses, Health, humor, neighbours, spectacle, vanity, vision
Making a spectacle of myself is not something I am wont to do unless advocating for the underdog or against some “machine” or other. But I nearly did today.
When my seventy-something neighbour approached me years ago out of the blue with an unanticipated accusation, I barely knew what to say to her. My husband stood there gaping in our kitchen as she fairly yelled at me.
“Janice, why didn’t you tell me I have all these wrinkles? My face looks so old! Why didn’t you tell me?”
In my eyes, in the five years we had lived across the street from her, she hadn’t changed one whit so I didn’t know what to say. Before I could manage to tell her that I didn’t know what to say, she clarified everything in her next statement.
“I just got my new glasses today and I was shocked when I looked in the mirror. I didn’t even recognize myself! I am a wrinkly old lady!” she said.
I could hear my husband suppressing laughter as he left us alone in the room.
“Oh,” I said, still not sure what to say.
That was before I had to start wearing eyeglasses myself.
That was before I realized I probably need a prescription upgrade.
Short on clothes to choose from since I am at a home away from home, I donned some acid wash leg-snugging blue jeans that weren’t originally mine, a soft cotton, baby-pink long-sleeved, scoop necked T that I normally use as sleep wear because the scoop is too low for public consumption (for me, in my opinion, that is) and a pair of pink and blue plaid cloth loafers I normally use as slippers.
The sun was shining and I was outside doing a few chores in the yard when I caught my reflection in the sliding glass doors and thought, who is she?
She looks so much younger, so flawless, I thought, there, that’s what I wish I look like. No one was about for me to make a spectacle of myself before I realized what I was really looking at. Me! And I can honestly say that I am living proof that some wishes do come true. Mine did.
As long as I postpone getting a new pair of spectacles.
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I’m afraid you have presbyopia. I wrote about it in one of my favorite blogs, which is so old that it was before anyone read my blog. But here it is, AND, I have a solution to the problem for you! http://fiftyfourandahalf.com/2011/06/20/corrective-packaging/
Enjoy!
Right on the money, Elyse! I too have mixed up spray in conditioner with hairspray, what a strange hair day that was, LOL And nearly brushed my teeth with… well, nevermind… LOL Lasik surgery, huh? Did it work? Thanks for the read and the link to yours, so funny
I’m still chuckling!
Great story!!! I think I’ll postpone getting my new glass now, lol. P, L & B, Terri
Well for sure, I am. I have my driving glasses so that will do. For now. LOL So glad you got a chuckle. I’m text stunned as well as tech stunned, Terri, I don’t know what P, L & B, is, sorry… but I do know what having you visit means and I thank you kindly for swinging by yet again
LOL – PLB is my own little thing, it means Peace, Love and Blessings!!
Awesome! Three Hearts to you! This means I am sending Love and Light to your Body, Mind and Spirit
Thank you!
I haven’t looked in a mirror for the best part of two decades.
M
LOL I’m going to try that and see if it will work as well as delaying a new eye exam, lol
J
LOL I love this post! Need a new pair of glasses too
And what “stylin’ ” specs they will be, I’m sure, with your fashion sense, MD
I had a similar moment today. I was doing my make-up in the car (as usual) but it wasn’t my normal pre-dawn time. It was when the sun was bright and high in the sky. There, on my face, were the dreaded crow’s feet. When did they get there? I think it’s time I start skipping my yearly eye appointments.
Skipping right alongside you, woman, LOL
Oh by the way…
Q. What did the first monocle say to the second monocle?
A. “Let’s get together and make a spectacle of ourselves.”
Are you calling me a monocle? LOL LOL
Well, who knows, maybe I could be… someday… I do know I could handle making a spectacle of myself if it is for a good cause.
Thanks for the giggles, Marie, see you soon
Very funny! LOL. I can imagine your perplexed expression at your dear neighbours accusation:) I got rid of my spects a few years back, they just didn’t go very well with the eye make-up and the nature of my face. Iol. I look stern enough without help from spectacles!
LOL, Hard to pictute you looking stern but that’s comical. Thank you for your comments and glad you worked a way out to still “see clearly” – I could never do contacts, have a hard time even putting any eye make up on, blink and flinch, that’s me. lol