1. Abandon your inner critic. Seriously. Whenever you post, be certain to offend even the rudest person possible. You’ll get more comments that way, rather criticism. But look at it this way: your site stats will soar, spin doctors say any PR is good PR. Then just agree with the critics. Or open a conversation that involves others to incite even more responses and thereby, traffic. I find those who make positive comments about your posts always far outnumber the critics. Besides, it’s our blog and we can say what we want to.
2. Abandon your good nature. Okay. Maybe. If anyone is very offensive or calls you names, simply report and delete the comment. You don’t even have to publish it. But post with abandon, as if you are writing for your life, as I am, and chances are, you will rarely receive any negative remarks. I did get some last year from family but I just didn’t publish them. Turns out they had it all wrong anyway (their assumptions). However, it can pay dividends to post any negative remarks to a) see if it causes you to think, question and discuss something in a new way b) see if it revs anybody else up because then you’ll really see who “has your back on here.”
3. Abandon talking about a topic or specific theme. Instead, ask questions, questions, questions. Random questions. Even if it’s “how old did you say you were?” Could be you will wind up learning a thing or two about the human response or just have a playful exchange. At the very least, the exchange or answers to your questions will inspire a whole other blog post.
4. Abandon eloquent vocabulary. Most of us don’t understand anything much beyond five syllables and race to Google it in another window so we can comprehend what is being said. Use curse words if you want to. Everyone knows what they are and nobody has to read them if they don’t want to. It’s not like we are sitting in public with a person saying F every second word. No one will even know you read posts with F words in them. Unless you tell them. I don’t.
5. Abandon Manners. Don’t worry. Why bother. It’s just a machine. Isn’t it? No civility necessary. Ooooops. Say please. Even though computers seem to have desensitized the manners of the masses and no one says please, thank you or you’re welcome as often as they used to, you’ll still be glad you used your manners. Okay, maybe you won’t be. But I always am. Unless somebody really pisses me off. Then I turn into my niece who, when they pre-empted her children’s show for ‘royal’ business several days in a row, said, “If they keep on doing that, I’m just not gonna’ care any more.” She was seven or eight. I know, I know, I’m not seven or eight but the move works. Pretty darn well.
6. Abandon humor, discussion or informative posts. Preach. Preach. Preach. Whatever it is you have to say preach it at people. They love it. NOT. Nobody likes to feel like they’ve just been lectured and told to sit on their hands for an hour. But it sure gets a good reaction. And you may even gain a follower or two from it all.
7. Abandon pictures. Wait. They are really good to spice up the content. Especially if you are exhausted a lot like I am these days and can’t think for yourself like I can’t. Pictures have their purpose. But if you let them be the focus then it’s really a pictorial not a tutorial or entertaining reading. Still, if you don’t want to disappoint your followers but are having a hard time drumming up a post, just find a picture that says something you can’t because you would be sued for it. Works for me.
8. Abandon that angel on one shoulder and devil on the other. Just let your mind flow out so we can really feel who you are and connect as if we were sitting in a room talking with you. Okay, I admit, I do not know how to do this. I was “jest” saying… because when I read a post and “feel” something, whatever I feel does not matter so much as the fact that the post “engaged” me.
9. Abandon worry about repetition. We are all prone to it. Vogler said there are only 10 original plots. I think he was right. Certain songs sound like others but aren’t. Certain literary works read like others but are not. And certain posts read so comfortably you could swear you read or wrote it yourself somewhere. But you likely didn’t. I hope.
10. Abandoning followers is a no go. Without them, we would not be here. With them, we spend every spare minute trying to find them all and keep up with their writings, sucking up every spare minute we thought we might have to write. But trust me, they are all worth it. I might not be like my followers nor they me but perhaps that’s what attracts us. Differences are a good thing, a blog thing we can all appreciate together.
11. I know I said 10. But then there’s that insurance pause. I mean clause: Abandon this post immediately, please, or your eyes may both cross right over your nose to each other never to return again. Because it was all written in a quick, light hearted moment of thinking about blogging, bloggers and why we all blog. I’ve read so many rules on blogging, I think I just became overwhelmed and wanted to rebel. If I did a good job, please follow me. If I failed, tell me so, I just may agree with you or ask you how old you are.